Travelers of Tyme engineer music precisely for holidays such as St. Valentine’s Day, a complex and contradictory day. For some, it is a day of romance, of flowers, sweet kisses, and nostalgic, warm conversation. For others, it is a day of heartache, of loneliness, and perhaps dark fantasies involving the Hallmark company and the calling of robotic minions to do biddings against the makers of cards. Regardless of where you find yourself this February 14th, we encourage you to lower the lights, pour a snifter of wine or whiskey for yourself and your special friend, if you have one, and switch on “Music for Lovers.” The Travelers cannot guarantee you will enjoy all of your experiences on this planet — but we CAN guarantee that we will make them sound better!

So go ahead, talk softly over “Music for Lovers.” Clink your glasses, kiss your kisses, whisper your sweet nothings into real or imagined ears. “Music for Lovers” is music meant to sway softly in the background, like a silhouetted palm tree in a warm, sea breeze. It is music to live to and, of course, music to love by!

(Note: listen at work and watch your productivity increase by 40%!)

Thank you, as always, for choosing Travelers of Tyme for all of your musical wallpaper needs. And Happy Valentine’s Day to you and your beloved, whether in flesh or fantasy.

Professor Yaya & Doctor Klem
The Travelers of Tyme

Picture it: a lonesome subterranean train platform. A balding man in a rumpled black suit stands, waiting, anxiously checking his watch, too often. He rocks on his heels. His train is late, so very late. And what is his final destination? Not one of us can answer that with any certainty, can we? So we might as well be patient. (Just don’t tell that to the Waiting Man. Our secret…) 

An empty train arrives – but it’s not the Waiting Man’s train. As the doors open, they unfold in slow motion as a beautiful brunette in a crisp pant suit emerges like a swan from a swirling gray mist. She seems not to walk but to hover, gliding across the platform, a gorgeous spectre existing beyond Tyme and space. With a wink and a slight smile to the Waiting Man, she mounts the escalator and is carried into an unknown fog above. What is her final destination? Who can say? Perhaps she has already arrived!

As for the Waiting Man, his train is still running late. And it always will be.

ALWAYS.

▲ ▲ ▲

The Travelers of Tyme present “Misty Businesswoman” b/w “Last Train to Limbo,” 2 songs constructed using sound samples of the Washington DC Metrorail. Whether you are waiting, in transit, or have already arrived at your destination, this music is specially designed to enhance your travel experience.

Thank you for spending six minutes and fifty-five seconds with us. We hope that you enjoy the rest of your Tyme in this Universe. It is a pleasant one.

Cordially,

Professor John Yaya and Doctor Klem
The Travelers of Tyme

http://tyme.bandcamp.com/album/christmas-tyme-is-here

http://tyme.bandcamp.com/album/release-zero

Only 50 pressed and ~30 remain.  You have no Tyme to waste!

TIME VACATIONS finally made possible through the POWER OF TYME!

SIGN UP now for a space on the HOMN, the mysterious craft of the TRAVELERS OF TYME, and experience the Universe through the LENS OF HISTORY!

WITNESS the great events of your planet from the comfort of our Observation Lounge, replete with a DAY SPA and fully stocked WET BAR! Don’t wait – there is no TYME to waste!

http://www.tymetravelnow.com/

I sleep inside of an oxygen tank now. Little children are afraid of me.

It’s almost getting to that… point. Where I feel like… I feel like this is… this is really it…

EPISODE 1 – NEVERLAND
EPISODE 2 – HERE’S JOHNNY!
EPISODE 3 – THE MAN IN THE MIRROR
EPISODE 4 – THE CHOICE OF A NEW GENERATION
EPISODE 5 – THIS IS IT (new this week)

See you on Saturday. I hope.

Pray for me.

***

If you missed it the first time, catch Steve Damien’s expansive Retrospective on the 13-year history of Detholz! which answers burning questions like, “what is the VORTECS Corporation?” And, “what the heck is ‘Behold the Man’ about?” If you find yourself nagged by questions like this, then this is the show for you :

Click here to download Steve Damien’s 2009 Retrospective on Detholz!

And remember to tune into http://www.wluw.org every Tuesday at 10 AM for the Retrospective! Or download episodes any time at

http://www.ilike.com/artist/Retrospective

Also:

Beware – take care! Beware… It’s TAPEBOX OF THE DEAD – the definitive Detholz! Halloween collection on two cassettes, featuring an array of unreleased material – is now available for online order from our pals at Plustapes! Visit http://www.plustapes.com to order!

And now, for a word from our sponsor:

Detholz! are pleased to announce the 10th Anniversary Halloween Jukebox of the Dead cover show has been confirmed. Buy tickets early and often as this show usually sells out. And, for all of you younger, sprightlier Detholz! fans, the show is 18 and up!

DETHOLZ! present:
JUKEBOX OF THE DEAD X
“FAME”
w/special guests BOBBY CONN & THE LOTO BALL SHOW with DJ sets by ONLY CHILDREN!
October 31, 2009
Lincoln Hall
2424 Lincoln Avenue
Chicago, IL
TICKETS ON SALE NOW @ http://www.lincolnhallchicago.com !

Plus, my hair hurts today.

Here’s the next thing I remember from my trip to Neverland:

EPISODE 1 – NEVERLAND
EPISODE 2 – HERE’S JOHNNY!
EPISODE 3 – THE MAN IN THE MIRROR
EPISODE 4 – THE CHOICE OF A NEW GENERATION (new this week)

Also, I forgot to mention: at Jukebox of the Dead X, the excellent Plustapes label is releasing our entire Halloween catalog on a limited edition two-cassette box set. From the proprietor:

“To help celebrate 10 years of Jukebox of the Dead, the all cassette label Plustapes will be releasing a limited edition (100) double cassette version of Detholz! covers including previously unreleased tracks. You can get them directly from the band, at Reckless records, Permanent records or via mailorder at http://www.plustapes.com. For more info email plustapes at gmail dot com.”

Glug.

***

Detholz! are pleased to announce the 10th Anniversary Halloween Jukebox of the Dead cover show has been confirmed. Buy tickets early and often as this show usually sells out. And, for all of you younger, sprightlier Detholz! fans, the show is 18 and up!

DETHOLZ! present:
JUKEBOX OF THE DEAD X
“FAME”
w/special guests BOBBY CONN & THE LOTO BALL SHOW with DJ sets by ONLY CHILDREN!
October 31, 2009
Lincoln Hall
2424 Lincoln Avenue
Chicago, IL
TICKETS ON SALE AS OF NOON TODAY @ http://www.lincolnhallchicago.com !

Not sleeping.

I hired some part-time help to clean around the house.

Listless.

Weak.

Here’s the latest from what I remember… from Neverland…

EPISODE 1 – NEVERLAND
EPISODE 2 – HERE’S JOHNNY!
EPISODE 3 – THE MAN IN THE MIRROR (new this week)

More next week as I recall what happened. Things start to get a little fuzzy after this…

***

Detholz! are pleased to announce the 10th Anniversary Halloween Jukebox of the Dead cover show has been confirmed. Buy tickets early and often as this show usually sells out. And, for all of you younger, sprightlier Detholz! fans, the show is 18 and up!

DETHOLZ! present:
JUKEBOX OF THE DEAD X
“FAME”
w/special guests BOBBY CONN & THE LOTO BALL SHOW with DJ sets by OF THE CHILDREN!
October 31, 2009
Lincoln Hall
2424 Lincoln Avenue
Chicago, IL
TICKETS ON SALE AS OF NOON TODAY @ http://www.lincolnhallchicago.com !

I have undergone the second stage of my transformation.

I’m not sure how I feel. A little green around the gills, I guess.

If you’re just tuning in, check last week’s post. I went out to L.A. and had a little… accident.

It had to do with a brush with FAME.

Literally.

I’ll be posting the story as I remember it…

EPISODE 1 – NEVERLAND
EPISODE 2 – HERE’S JOHNNY! (new this week)

See below for the adverts. I don’t really have the energy to write any more…

Detholz! are pleased to announce the 10th Anniversary Halloween Jukebox of the Dead cover show has been confirmed. Buy tickets early and often as this show usually sells out. And, for all of you younger, sprightlier Detholz! fans, the show is 18 and up!

DETHOLZ! present:
JUKEBOX OF THE DEAD X
“FAME”
October 31, 2009
Lincoln Hall
2424 Lincoln Avenue
Chicago, IL
Tickets available soon at www.schubas.com

Detholz! are pleased to announce the 10th Anniversary Halloween Jukebox of the Dead cover show has been confirmed. Buy tickets early and often as this show usually sells out. And, for all of you younger, sprightlier Detholz! fans, the show is 18 and up!

DETHOLZ! present:
JUKEBOX OF THE DEAD X
“FAME”
October 31, 2009
Lincoln Hall
2424 Lincoln Avenue
Chicago, IL
Tickets available soon at www.schubas.com

FAME?  WHY FAME, YOU ASK?

After 10 years of picking through the candied detritus of pop music’s underside at Halloween – and after 13 years almost to the day as a band – Detholz! have been locked away in recent months, chewing on our thumbnails, reflecting on the fleeting nature of mortality, the preservation of our legacy and, most importantly, the liberal application of exfoliating lotions.

To that end, I had occasion this week to visit my Los Angeles offices (don’t ask) for a very special Tuesday appointment.  The meeting, as it turned it out, went very poorly.  Extremely so.

In fact, I barely escaped alive.  But I did escape.  And was… transformed.

I kept a verbal record of this experience on my dictaphone for my secretary, Jean, that I am posting here for all the world to hear.  And, on Halloween, we shall emerge from our chrysalis for all the world to see:

FAME and FORTUNE

SUCCESS and TRIUMPH

REMEMBER

REMEMBER

REMEMBER…

Click here for FAME EPISODE 1 : Neverland